不吼不叫:如何平静地让孩子与父母合作

豆瓣8.3分,基于气质研究和正念理论,为你提供强有力的技巧,以减少家庭冲突,促进合作、尊重和相互理解。你还会学到一些策略,帮助你在沮丧达到峰值时管理好自己的压力。

作者:[美]罗娜·雷纳 著,钟煜 译

出版社:上海社会科学院出版社出版时间:2016-03-01

开本:16开页数:256页

定价: ¥32.8

不吼不叫:如何平静地让孩子与父母合作([美]罗娜·雷纳 著,钟煜 译)-什么书值得看好书推荐

不吼不叫:如何平静地让孩子与父母合作 版权:

ISBN:9787552010817
条形码:9787552010817 ; 978-7-5520-1081-7
装帧:简裝本
版次:1
册数:暂无
重量:暂无
印刷次数:1
所属分类:家庭教育>家教方法

不吼不叫:如何平静地让孩子与父母合作 特点:

理解大吼大叫的深层因素;

提供不吼不叫的强力工具。

你真的可以学会停止向孩子吼叫!

本书基于气质研究和正念理论,为你提供强有力的技巧,以减少家庭冲突,促进合作、尊重和相互理解。你还会学到一些策略,帮助你在沮丧达到峰值时管理好自己的压力;掌握实用的解决方法,帮助你恢复冷静,能够以让大人和孩子都受益的方式带着同情心与孩子有效沟通。

作者认为,我们为什么会吼叫有着诸多的原因,必须一一理清,找到属于自己的吼叫原因。这些原因可能有:外部触发的原因,例如孩子哼哼唧唧的抱怨;内部触发的原因,例如个人感到焦虑、失望、害怕等,以及身体健康的原因如缺乏睡眠;家族遗传,自己就是被父母吼大的;父母和孩子气质的差异……每一种原因都会对我们和孩子的关系形成负面的挑战。

许多父母可能知道不应该吼叫,也有改正的想法,却因为不得其法而功亏一篑。针对各种原因,作者提出了诸多不吼不叫的策略和工具:理解自己,自我同情,吼叫的不是你一个人,因此不必为此焦急;观察自己,何时何地你*可能爆发吼叫;了解自己和孩子气质的差异;建立追踪吼叫表,记录事件情形、你的反应、后续发展、事后评估等;停止吼叫的a-b-c-d-e法则:自问(ask)、呼吸(breath)、平静自我(calmyourself)、确定孩子的需要(decidewhatyourchildneeds)、应用同理心(empathize);管教的4c法:沟通(communication)、选择(choices)、结果(consequences)、连接(connection);还有使用定时器,召开家庭会议,运用每日常规、表格和日历等。每一样工具都有丰富的内涵,具有极强的可操作性,并且都是被反复验证行之有效的方法。

Understand the deep factors of yelling;
Provide powerful tools that don’t roar or shout.
You can really learn to stop yelling at children!
Based on temperament research and mindfulness theory, this book provides you with powerful skills to reduce family conflict and promote cooperation, respect and mutual understanding. You will also learn some strategies to help you manage your stress when depression peaks; Master practical solutions to help you regain your composure and communicate effectively with children with compassion in a way that benefits both adults and children.
The author believes that there are many reasons why we roar. We must clarify one by one and find our own roaring reasons. These reasons may include: external triggers, such as children’s complaints; Internal triggers, such as personal anxiety, disappointment, fear, etc., and physical health reasons, such as lack of sleep; Family inheritance, I was yelled by my parents; The difference in temperament between parents and children… Every reason will pose a negative challenge to our relationship with children.
Many parents may know that they should not roar and have the idea of correcting, but they fall short because they can’t do anything. For various reasons, the author puts forward many strategies and tools for not yelling: understand yourself and sympathize with yourself. You are not the one yelling, so you don’t have to worry about it; Watch yourself, when and where you * may roar; Understand the differences in temperament between yourself and your child; Establish a follow-up roar form to record the event situation, your response, follow-up development, post evaluation, etc; A-b-c-d-e rules for stopping roaring: ask yourself, breathe, calm yourself, decide what your child needs, and emphasize; The 4C method of discipline: communication, choices, sequences and connection; There are also timers, family meetings, daily routines, tables and calendars. Each tool has rich connotation, has strong operability, and is an effective method verified repeatedly.

不吼不叫:如何平静地让孩子与父母合作 简介:

 

作者近50年的专业经验,深刻而有效的解决方案

真正帮助父母停止无用而伤人的吼叫,与孩子建立全面的合作关系

“终于有了一本深刻又实用,并不羞辱人或者试图说教的书。”——肖莎娜·贝内特博士,临床心理学家,父母抑郁方向的专家

 

为人父母本来就是一项艰难的工作!更别提你的孩子连一些小事都不肯听话——不肯把玩具捡起来,不愿去洗澡,甚至不肯上车去学校——这些都很容易让人火冒三丈,不由自主大吼大叫起来,往往还说出一些令自己后悔和沮丧的话,伤害孩子,也让自己感到挫败。

如果你也是一位容易过度反应的父母,你肯定试图有所改变,但却求变无门。幸运的是,罗娜·雷纳通过总结自己近50年的专业育儿经验,又运用气质理论告诉我们,真的不需要大吼大叫,你也可以找到温柔有效的方法让孩子合作。

本书告诉你:

●父母们吼叫的原因以及他们为什么想要改变。

●吼叫会对孩子和成人有什么影响。

●日常生活中是哪些因素的逐渐积累*终导致我们又吼又叫。

●如何辨识引发吼叫的隐性因素。

●你的个性以及你的孩子的个性对“吼叫”有什么影响。

●你为什么想要停止吼叫。

●如何减少吼叫——就从现在开始。

  

 
The author has nearly 50 years of professional experience and profound and effective solutions
Really help parents stop useless and hurtful yelling and establish a comprehensive cooperative relationship with their children
“Finally, there is a profound and practical book that does not humiliate people or try to preach.” - Dr. shashana Bennett, clinical psychologist and expert in parental depression
 
Being a parent is a hard job! Not to mention that your children are not obedient to even some small things - they are not willing to pick up toys, take a bath, or even get on the bus to school - these are easy to make people angry and shout involuntarily. They often say something that makes them regret and depressed, hurt the children, and make themselves feel frustrated.
If you are also a parent who is prone to overreaction, you must try to change, but there is no way to change. Fortunately, by summarizing her nearly 50 years of professional parenting experience and using the temperament theory, Rona Reina tells us that you really don’t need to yell. You can also find gentle and effective ways to let children cooperate.
This book tells you:
● why parents yell and why they want to change.
● how does yelling affect children and adults.
● what factors gradually accumulate in daily life * eventually lead us to yell and shout.
● how to identify the hidden factors that cause roaring.
● how does your personality and your child’s personality affect “roaring”.
● why do you want to stop yelling.
● how to reduce yelling - from now on.   

不吼不叫:如何平静地让孩子与父母合作 目录:

目录  序言:我为什么会对孩子吼叫?    前言 你不是一个人在战斗   你可以学会停止向孩子大吼大叫   重新开始永远都不晚    *部分 理解吼叫 第1章 “是我在大吼大叫吗?”     ——学会了解自己   如何知道自己在吼叫(或是没有吼叫)   吼叫可曾有用?   吼叫如何影响孩子   感受吼叫对孩子的影响   做一个“足够好”的父母   但是我想现在就减少吼叫!  第2章 我为什么吼叫?     ——理解促发吼叫的日常因素   那些容易让你发脾气的日常因素   当吼叫变成习惯   了解自己   你的孩子看到了什么?   准备战斗,还是逃跑?    第3章 “为什么是我在吼叫?”     ——看到更深层的原因   吼叫代代相传   迁怒于人:我到底是在朝谁发火?   当吼叫和愤怒导致虐待   发现藏在愤怒之下的感受   你的健康状况如何?   羞愧    第4章 气质会带来什么影响?     ——让你的养育方式适应孩子的天性   透过气质的角度观察   发现和接纳个体差异   你的孩子和你的气质的协调   由气质引发的较量    第二部分 减少吼叫的日常策略 第5章 “吼叫这么容易就出口……我真能停下来吗?”     ——观察和收集数据,为成功做准备   追踪你的吼叫   追踪风暴,找到它因何而起   自我同情    第6章 “除了吼叫,我还能做什么?”     ——逐步调整,慢慢改善  另眼看待管教   如何练习a-b-c-d-e法则   管教的4c法则   要理智也要尊重    第7章 “救命,又一波风暴即将来袭!”     ——保持平静,休整,规划路线   用道歉修复过往   积极主动减少吼叫   丰富多样的“不吼不叫策略”    第三部分 特殊情况 第8章 “救命!吼叫的人不是我”     ——处理家里其他人吼叫的情况  “我的配偶认为吼叫很正常”  “爷爷朝我的孩子吼叫”  “我的亲戚们觉得我女儿是个讨厌鬼”   “我伴侣的吼叫像是虐待”   压垮骆驼的后一根稻草   寻求帮助    第9章 “生活有那么多难题,我怎么能做到停止吼叫?”     ——解决困境、混乱与差异  面对离婚和分居   单亲家庭的挑战   养父母或者负责照顾孩子的亲戚的艰难工作   养育有残疾、发育迟缓的孩子或者特殊儿童   注意力缺失/多动症   情绪失调和精神疾病   寻求专业帮助    后记 世界和平始于家庭   致谢   附录1  冥想   附录2 补充阅读材料   附录3 原书参考文献 

不吼不叫:如何平静地让孩子与父母合作 作者:

罗娜·雷纳(RonaRenner,RN),1966年毕业于布鲁克林学院的护士学校,从此献身于帮助家庭解决麻烦、减少痛苦。她的主要经历包括:在纽约和加利福尼亚的多个医院工作,参与多个精神健康项目;在非洲的扎伊尔(今天的刚果民主共和国)训练妇女们预备分娩;在印度的普纳帮助开始一个学习障碍项目;在南加利福尼亚的凯撒医疗机构提供父母教育和儿童多动症与气质咨询。雷纳是“童年时代的事情”(ChildhoodMatters)和“NuestrosNios”父母热线的创始人,她主持“童年时代的事情”广播秀有十年之久。她自己有一群最棒的教师,他们是他的四个孩子,两个孙子,还有她的丈夫米克。她住在加利福尼亚的伯克利。更多信息请访问nurserona.com。

Rona Renner (RN), who graduated from the nursing school of Brooklyn College in 1966, has devoted herself to helping families solve problems and reduce pain. Her main experiences include: working in multiple hospitals in New York and California and participating in multiple mental health projects; Training women for childbirth in Zaire, Africa (today’s Democratic Republic of the Congo); Help start a learning disability project in Pune, India; The Kaiser medical institution in Southern California provides parental education and counseling on ADHD and temperament. Reina is the founder of “childhood matters” and “Nuestros NIOS” parents’ hotline. She has hosted the “childhood matters” radio show for ten years. She has a group of the best teachers herself. They are his four children, two grandchildren and her husband Mick. She lives in Berkeley, California. For more information, please visit nurserona.com.

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